Many women have spent years caretaking, loving, and providing for those around them. It is a primitive tendency that we’ve become accustomed to, and often admire about ourselves and others. As we age, these affinities can take away from prioritizing our own health and well-being. This is a divergent way of thinking, which requires adaptability as we approach the years our bodies need us most.
Perimenopause, often referenced as the menopausal transition, is the umbrella term for the years our bodies undergo abundant changes hormonally, physically, and emotionally to shift into menopause. This timeline looks different for everyone, some women can start feeling the effects in their mid-thirties, and others are well into their forties. The conversation around perimenopause is something that should be normal and accessible.
This is a time for cherishing the natural changes of our bodies and honouring what we deserve and desire. If we spend these years fighting the inevitable, it will only complicate the process. These years are times of feminine grace, abundance, and patience. It won’t always be easy, but there are ways to mitigate the isolation and confusion that can come as a result.
Women are intelligent, and we want information about our bodies.
I’m sure many can relate to the feeling of being misunderstood and misrepresented during this time of life. Unfortunately, not every doctor has the personal experience to relate to what’s happening in the midlife woman’s body.
We want to make informed choices about our food and health. Oftentimes, we are flooded with abundant intuition over what we need, and we neglect these signals. This can lead to an internal battle that’s draining and offers no true relief. There comes a time, especially during perimenopause, where you have to put your own oxygen mask on and start prioritizing what’s truly the best decision for you and your body.
You know better than anyone, trust yourself and lean into it.
Yes, I hear you, perimenopause can be debilitating. We start listening to that voice in our head that says diet, restrict, exercise more, and get on with it. Mid-life can be a time of career changes, maybe your children are going off to school, your marriage dynamic is shifting. On top of all of this, you’re dealing with immense internal shifts that deserve attention just as much as the rest of your responsibilities. The stress we induce on our bodies by resisting these signs can be more detrimental than leaning into the rest and care we deserve.
Our body can’t tell the difference between external and internal stress. So whether you really are being chased by a lion, or just mentally spiraling on your endless to-do list, this response activates the body all the same. You could be sitting at your desk writing emails, and carrying the stress of life and death on your back. Biochemistry is It is important to say ‘I am going to eat what my body needs, feel comfortable and sleep adequately.’ Take a nap, learn how to rest for maybe the first time in years. Any extra weight you may have will fall off as your cortisol releases, and as you adapt to the new reality you face in these unparalleled years.
“Learn to read symptoms not only as problems to be overcome but as messages to be heeded.”
― Gabor Maté,
When we’re faced with prolonged fight or flight response periods, most of our other priorities get neglected. Let’s go back to the lion analogy, if your life was in danger simple acts of self-care like eating, using the bathroom, and rest would be the last thing on your mind. When our bodies are neglected, we don’t have the proper time and Perimenopause is the time where your ovaries start winding down as your body comes toward menopause. This looks different for everyone, depending on your stress and your personal biography.
Our bodies are our biography.
While this can feel overwhelming, human beings are immensely adaptable. You can take control of your stress by Some of us have had families, others haven’t. Some of us have had fertility treatments or lived in busy cities with polluted air and water quality. There are many factors that play into the reality of perimenopause, and our environment has a direct impact on our hormones. Our estrogen begins to deplete as a precedent to the menopausal period. It can be a bumpy road of patchy periods, hormonal imbalances, and a slew of side effects.
When female estrogen supplies are lower, we become dominant in cortisol or stress hormones. This can result in sleep deprivation, higher anxiety, achiness, night sweats, and hot flashes. Things generally just become uncomfortable. You might feel weepy or like you are constantly awaiting belly bloat and an insatiable chocolate craving. The peace comes from accepting the normalcy in this change. Stop the judgment, and learn to be kind to yourself, and accept this as a transition.
It is just that, a transition.
Once you understand the boundaries of what you can and can’t handle, it’s easier to prepare and control your responses and handle them productively. Some days I can only handle a couple of things on my plate before I start feeling overwhelmed. On the other hand, other people can handle seven or eight things and still be ready to take on more. So again, everyone is different. Try to reflect and tap into what these boundaries look like for you.Support your body with optimal food and nutrition and make the lifestyle changes that make you feel good. Go for a long walk instead of that HIIT workout. Take a nap if it’s what you need.
After menopause, you can shift back into intermittent fasting or lifestyle changes that might be a bit more strenuous. However, during these years, the more stress you put on your body the more resistance will come as a result. Let’s admit it, it’s already hard enough. You don’t need to be pushing your body into fight or flight mode any more than it already is.
Ideally, our adrenal glands are supposed to take over at this point of menopause and supply us with estrogen to support the menopausal process. However, our bodies are normalized to high stress in the modern world, constantly supplying cortisol to uphold our busy lives. Our adrenals simply don’t have the capacity to fund the estrogen necessary to lessen the weight of the premenopausal process.
Stress management is essential in aiding this transition and lessening the dreadful symptoms that leave you feeling drained. Read more on what stress is here.
My main advice:
Listen to your body and be gentle with your thoughts.
Focus on organic, grass fed and wild caught sources of protein. Healthy fats, and supplying your body with the minerals and micronutrients it needs. Try not to lean too heavily on your morning caffeine and evening wine to get you through the day. And prioritise your sleep.
While treats are necessary, make sure your body is getting what it needs to feel the best. Perimenopause is an essential time to focus on these often neglected forms of self-care.
Remember that your body won’t release weight until you’ve dealt with health issues like inflammation, balancing blood sugar levels, equalizing your thyroid, and lowering your cortisol.
While all of this can sound overwhelming, and perimenopause often is. It is essential to focus on your mindset, listen to your body and what it is trying to tell you. There is an element of perimenopause and mid-life, that is coming home to yourself, accepting yourself, and loving yourself, sometimes for the first time in your life.
You are here, and instead of running from it try to embrace it through the ups and downs. Look inwards and start giving yourself the nurturing you’ve given others for so many years.
I hope this post helps you understand what perimenopause is, so you are able to be aware of it and manage this transitional chapter.
The less stress you induce on yourself, the better you will feel.
So keep that in mind next time you start to feel overwhelmed by everything on your plate.
IIt is time to step into midlife with empowerment and less judgment. You are not alone, and these are some steps you can take to harness control of your life during this unruly time.
cheers x Julie